Resurrection

I spent this weekend in the Lake District with several other instructors and students from my martial arts group for our newly annual “summer camp.” It was such a good weekend that not only have we already booked the same location for the same weekend next year, but I also decided to write my first blog post since 2011 to record its events!

 

The plan was simple. A couple of other instructors and I would meet at our instructor’s house late Friday afternoon, and from there we would share a car up to the resort, arriving early in the evening to have a group meal and socialise before bed. On Saturday and Sunday there would be training with the chief instructors of the entire federation in the morning, followed by a pre-selected outdoor activity in the afternoon. On Saturday evening there would be another group meal, Sunday evening would be spent travelling home, and a good time would have been had by all.

This all suited me perfectly, and I was eagerly anticipating the trip. However, on Thursday afternoon, I was informed of a slight alteration to the plan: as part of our “masters” test, another instructor and I would be teaching a portion of one of the seminars, under the watchful eyes of the four existing master instructors. This wouldn’t be a problem, but for the short notice and the fact that the other instructor and I live on opposite sides of the country, so there would be no preparation time whatsoever.

 

The second change to the plan came at about midday on Friday when my lift to our instructor’s house informed me he would be picking me up at two o’clock, rather than five. Typically, I had left my packing until the last minute, and I still had shopping to do so that Lewis would have food available while I was away!

 

I (just about) managed to get everything sorted in time, and we were on our way. The journey was pleasant enough, although as the most junior member in the car, I had no choice but to spend the entire trip squashed in the back of my instructor’s convertible! We arrived a few hours before the meal would begin, as did most other people, so a game of football was organised. I lost track of the score once both teams ventured into double figures (which was partially due to the attacking prowess of each team, but mostly the complete lack of defenders), however everyone seemed to enjoy themselves and got thoroughly muddy and sweaty enough to deem a pre-meal shower necessary.

 

The meal was delicious, although I did regret my choice for the main course, as another option looked even nicer! After the meal, we sat around in the reception area and had a good old chat until I retired to bed at around half past eleven. At first I struggled to get to sleep, however once I was out I slept like a log.

 

The seminar on Saturday morning was due to start at nine o’clock in a sports centre a half-hour drive away from where we were staying. This meant a very early start to the day, even earlier than my usual wake-up time, which meant I was still feeling groggy after my shower. A combination of the previous day’s football and the unusually early start left me feeling quite inflexible, however once we had warmed up, the seminar went very well.

 

In the afternoon, my chosen activity was rock climbing. Our instructor was equal parts funny and helpful, and the activity was thoroughly enjoyable. Through a combination of expert guidance, determination, brute force and ignorance, I got the hang of it pretty quickly. However, the children who had opted for rock climbing were by far the stars of the afternoon, climbing the rock face like Spiderman!

 

Back at the resort, another football match was organised, but with fewer players and (slightly) more structure. For example, this match featured more defenders and therefore not as many goals – only nine, in fact! My team won (I scored the winning goal in extra time), and then it was time for another stunning meal. The evening was again spent chatting until I went to bed, once again at about half past eleven.

 

Sunday morning’s training was due to start an hour later than Saturday’s, however we also had to pack all our stuff and be out of our rooms before the seminar. Fortunately, I travel light, so it didn’t take me very long to pack. Unfortunately, the fact that we didn’t teach on Saturday meant that at least a portion of Sunday’s seminar would be dedicated to assessing our teaching ability. As it turned out, the whole two-hour seminar was to be used for that purpose. In the end, it went well and we got some pointers to help us in future.

 

In the afternoon, my chosen activity was “gorge scrambling,” about which I didn’t know very much, other than that we would be getting wet. In the end, it turned out to be immense fun as we made our way down a hill in a stream. At different points, we had to slide down slopes, jump off ledges into pools of water, belly flop over edges and even swim through a waterfall! I won’t lie, some of it was tough, some of it was even a little bit scary, but most of all it was great fun! The finale was a belly flop over a ledge through a pretty narrow gap between rocks, which took a while for me to convince myself to do, however I was glad I did do it.

 

Once we got back to the resort, it was time to head home. The return journey took a while longer than the journey there, because someone had been playing with the in-car satnav and changed the settings; however we eventually all got back to Manchester at about half past eight. I got home at about nine o’clock, had a bit of a chat with Lewis, and went straight to bed because I was exhausted!

 

The weekend was so great that the same place was booked again before we even left, and my name is already down for next year. Plus, my fourth dan test has officially begun… I guess there’s no backing out now!

New Year’s Revolution

A while ago, I subscribed to WordPress’ “The Daily Post” service, and have continued to receive emails with ideas about which I could write. Unfortunately, I am not a natural writer, so until I find a topic with which I am comfortable, I struggle. Today, the email came through with a post which suggested one look at how one makes resolutions, and why they fail. Over on LiveJournal, I am fairly infamous for starting each year with a long post containing many new year’s resolutions, none of which are still intact by the end of January. So, I read this post instead of reading the title and glancing over the content, as I usually do.

1. Pick one resolution, or one more than you completed last year. Your odds of staying focused improve.

This first point had a big enough impact that I wanted to revise my whole goal-setting strategy, never mind just new year’s resolutions! I realised that “one resolution” and “one more than you completed last year” are, in my case, the same thing. So, making just one resolution seems to be in order.

But what? The reason I have always made dozens of resolutions is because I want to improve in many different ways, in many different areas of my life. Such vast and varied improvement is impossible to summarise in one mere statement, other than the horrendously vague “I will do better.” So, I decided to skip past the actual content of the resolution for now, and focus on definitely only making one.

2. Look at last years list and evaluate where you failed. Too ambitious? Where did you give up? Use this self-knowledge to inform this year’s resolutions.

Bingo, got it in one! Too ambitious. I want success to a high level, and more importantly, I want it now. If I don’t see short-term improvements, I often lose sight of the so-called “bigger picture.” Often I gave up at the first hurdle, because my expectations were so high that a setback became a failure, as it was impossible to recover. Therefore, this year’s resolution must be a progressive target, where one minor hiccough does not shut the door on all future progress.

3. Break any resolution into monthly goals so you have short term focus.

Now we’re talking! However, the problem of what goal to set has now resurfaced. Which resolutions can I break down monthly? Maybe this would help me decide which one will be more achievable… Or maybe I’ll discover that any one of last year’s goals could have been broken down in such a way. Back to the drawing board!

4. Find a friend who can sign up to the same goal. We are social creatures, and our goals should be social.

Well, that narrows things down a little. If I set a work-related goal, which is one of the areas in which I usually set some resolutions, I only work (on a daily basis) with one person, so my “resolution buddy” will at least be easy to find. But what if I don’t choose something work-related? I could choose to improve the social aspect of my life, which is again an area which usually receives attention at this time of the year. Who would I work with on that? That answer is much trickier.

5. Write down the resolution and sign it. Writing has power.

Well, I guess this is it. My obsessive nature won’t allow me to simply bypass this and do it at the end, so it’s decision time. However, there’s still more pieces of valuable advice in the post. Do I read them first? No, I’ll continue as I am; it’s worked reasonably well so far. I understand that you are more likely to achieve a goal if you write it down, but of course you need to know what your goal is before you can do so. I’m beginning to remember why Christmas and new year are the time of year I find stressful. It’s not the abundance of expenses and shortage of money, it’s all this enforced decision-making, all the self-imposed pressure of living up to my own expectations.

However, I am stalling. My new year’s resolution will be… [insert lengthy pause between previous and next button presses] … to become more organised.

I know, not worth the wait, huh? However, the more I think about it, the more I realise that not only is it the best new year’s resolution I have ever set myself, it is also the best one I could ever hope to set. It’s suitably vague that various goals can be encompassed within it – keeping the house cleaner and tidier; separating work and home life more effectively; sorting out my social circles and stopping wasting time on those not worthy; actually completing the tasks on my to-do list, or at least more of them; spending my time at work more productively – the list is practically endless. I don’t have a daunting, endless list in front of me, though… I have half of a sheet of A4 scrap paper containing only the words “I WILL BECOME MORE ORGANISED!” written in bold, black magic marker. I am satisfied.

6. Put your written resolution somewhere useful (e.g. in front of the fridge)

I am currently at work, so it’s going to have to be here. I suppose that’s no bad thing, though. I spend a quarter of my life in this building at the moment, a third of it asleep (so having the note nearby at that point is neither use nor ornament) and a mighty three per cent of my entire life travelling to and from work. I spend a further four hours (including travelling) per week on my Cadishead class, which is over two per cent of my life. In all, I spend approximately thirty per cent of my life awake at home, which doesn’t take into account the time spent food shopping, running errands, visiting friends and family, extra time spent at work doing things like writing WordPress because I don’t have internet at home… I think I’m better off with my resolution being at work.

7. Have a daily positive task – mark off a day on a calendar every day you’ve met your resolution. You get a positive visual reminder you’re on your way.

This is possibly the simplest part – I have a daily to-do list anyway, so more things being checked off more regularly is an easy indication I’m organising my time better. Moving on…

8. Divide further: simply make a resolution for January, and re-evaluate on Feb 1st.

After all the thought that went into this resolution, I need mini-resolutions, too? Forget it! I have come to the realisation through this post that the reason I fail my resolutions every year is because they are resolutions. Every goal I have ever set myself I have achieved (since I learned about proper goal setting), whereas every resolution I have set, I have failed. So, my new year’s resolution is going to be “I will not set myself any new year’s resolutions!” What I need is goals. Goals are an end result, and therefore more measurable than resolutions, which are a process. My mini-resolution for January is to do a similar post to this, using the same quotes, however replacing the word (and concept) “resolution” with “goal” or “goals,” whichever is appropriate.

I guarantee the outcome will be different.

The Intruder

Last week, I had a most frightful encounter. I got into my car, and at once felt uneasy. There was something wrong, something out of place, a presence that should not have been there.

I kept glancing in my rear-view mirror, trying to catch sight of that which was plaguing me, but to no avail. The nine mile journey from home to work had never seemed longer, and I couldn’t wait to get out of my car, to try to escape.

With the majority of the journey behind me, suddenly my visitor decided to make itself known. I caught sight of it in my rear-view mirror and nearly drove off the road in shock! The last few miles of my journey, I could have been killed. Rather than focusing my attention on the road, I was forced to wrestle with this invader, having only my mirror’s help in seeing my enemy.

I wasn’t going to give up. This was my territory, my turf, and I would not be invaded! In the sanctity of my own car, I don’t expect such traumatic experiences, it feels like my own safe haven. I guess this just goes to show we are never truly safe, never truly protected.

As I miraculously arrived at work, I finally overpowered my foe. One final burst of energy, and my car door burst open, my face smiling in victory, and my enemy banished forever…

As I arrived, so did Dave (my boss), and I showed him my fallen foe, yet my joy faded away as it dawned upon me that this would become an eternal, unwinnable battle until I die. Lying in the palm of my hand, staring back at me, silently mocking my mortality, was my first grey hair.

Moderation

A good while after my “Inspiration” post, about my lack thereof, I discovered “The Daily Post.” I like the concept, however forcing myself to write on a topic about which I have little to no opinion just for the sake of it isn’t my style. So, I subscribed, and I waited.

Today, an email arrived in my inbox which caught my attention instantly. Today’s topic idea was “should everything be done in moderation?” To answer that question, I would have to understand moderation, as it certainly does not come naturally to me. I have what you might call an addictive personality.

I am very much in the “all or nothing” camp, as I obsess over one particular thing until suddenly the interest leaves me and I find something else on which to waste a large portion of my time. Recently, this has been demonstrated with WWE SmackDown Vs. Raw 2011 for the PlayStation3. The game has what I believe to be a wonderful game mode in which you can create a storyline using matches and various scenes, and I am hooked.

A small group of my friends frequently meet for a “lads’ night” which usually revolves around playing computer games, and I offered the suggestion that two of the regulars, a “future regular” and I choose a wrestler each, and I would create a story which would change based on our performance and results as we played through it.

Since that decision, I haven’t seen the sun.

Obviously, I’m exaggerating, but I’m doing so to make a point. Another example is drinking. I am currently straight-edge, which wasn’t a very difficult, life-changing decision to make, as I have never even had a drag of a cigarette, nor taken any illegal drugs (nor many legal ones more extreme than Calpol).

I have been “toxin-free” for about three months now, which I’m not saying to make it seem like a big deal, it’s a relatively short period of time. My point is that I went from drinking every evening when I got home from work “just because there’s beer in the fridge” and doing my utmost to destroy my liver every Saturday night to completely substance-free in one short sentence: “from now on, I’m going to be straight-edge.”

The reason alcohol is a good example is that doctors repeatedly say that alcohol is good for you in moderation. Maybe this is just my experience as a result of my age and therefore my social group, but does anyone drink in moderation? It seems to me that every time someone decides to “have a quick drink” the actual goal is to find out what having their stomach pumped feels like. I’m not judging, it was the same for me.

I referred earlier to the fact that I have never taken a drag of a cigarette – there are two main reasons for that. The first is that I simply don’t understand the appeal of smoking (and neither do smokers, it would seem), however that’s a different story for a different day. My other reason is that I would not be a social smoker, oh no. I would be smoking somewhere between forty and a hundred cigarettes a day within a month of my first drag!

Before I conclude by actually answering the question, I would like to try to explain my “all or nothing” mentality. To me, not having that focus on any one particular thing means a diluted (and therefore less successful) attempt at each of the several things you do.

For example, I am currently very much focused on my work, and making money. I intend to be for the next few years, so as to then find myself in the position that I never need to work again. As a result, I work all the hours I can reasonably expect myself to (I am far from a natural workaholic, I assure you), to the point that I can only hope I don’t get murdered in my sleep the next time I tell my girlfriend I will be “going into work early again tomorrow.”

Naturally, I need my down time, which is where the alcohol used to come in, and now it’s my story I am creating. I have a rigid work/play schedule which would scare many, however I am reaping the rewards. I have seen a steady increase in my productivity (and my earnings) since adopting this mentality and I know I will continue to do so.

In answer to the question, absolutely nothing should be done in moderation. That’s not to say you can’t aim for more than one goal at once, as long as there’s either a clear divide between your goals so you can focus on one at a time (for example my money aspirations and my story creation in my down time), or the goals are both achieved through the same means (for example: more money and a new car pretty much run hand-in-hand).

Inspiration

I created a WordPress account a while ago now. I already run a LiveJournal, which I use as a bit of a play-by-play account of my daily life, however my vision for my WordPress was different. I was introduced by my friend, KurlyKurt, who I think has a great writing style – one I certainly wouldn’t mind being able to emulate.

However, since I made this account, I haven’t been able to find anything about which to write, so have hit a bit of a brick wall at the moment. So, if anyone is reading this, I would appreciate it if you leave a comment on this post with an idea for what I can write about in my second post.

For now, that is all I have, I hope my next post has a bit more inspiration behind it!